Life Resource Center

Fear of Change

... The way to build self confidence is to
start doing things you’re not sure
you can do….Like baking your
own bread. Like painting a picture
…Do it.  Seize the day and get started
and stay with it, and things will

Introduction

An old Hebrew proverb says “change takes but an instant.”  It is the resistance to change that can take a lifetime.  It is often said we resist change because it is difficult or painful.  This is not exactly accurate as it is our resistance to change that makes it so stressful.

Since change is the only thing constant in our lives, why is it so frightening to choose to change. Often it is thrust upon us and we didn’t see it coming. It may come in a way that cuts us off at the knees, such as having life as we know it obliterated, a tornado or hurricane. Somehow when such happens, time and time again we observe people having the courage and determination to reach down into their reservoir of resilience to deal with catastrophe. Where did all of this courage, fearlessness, faith, determination come from we on the sidelines ask? How were they able to do it?

And now let us welcome the New Year full of things that have never been - Rainer Marie Rilke
Every New Year we make resolutions; to stick to an exercise program, to be more patient etc., telling ourselves this year will be different.  Studies have shown however that only about 40% of resolutions are successful after 6 months.  Wanting to change is not enough, relying on will power is not enough.  So what gets in our way?  Not knowing ourselves at a deep level is a major impediment to change.  Without this knowing we are unaware of the emotional triggers that keep us repeating our negative experiences.  Change takes time, it requires being realistic.  It takes planning, and making decisions regarding a positive replacement for that which you want to extinguish.