Life Resource Center

The last two months of the year often find us in a frantic state of shopping, decorating, traveling and on the high energy activities.  Instead of having fun we often end up ill, anxious or depressed.  There seems to be an assumption that everybody is supposed to be happy simply because "The Holidays” are here.  This expectation of merriment presents an unrealistic goal for many.

Different groups experience difficulties with the seasonal pressures in different ways.  Today I’ll focus on the recently widowed and divorced who are still grieving their losses and may dread going through the Holidays as single people.  Some of my suggestions are:

• Expect some sadness this year, it’s normal, if you are extremely depressed seek professional help.
• Give yourself permission to stop, and decide how you want to do things this year.
• No pressuring of yourself with a lot of shoulds or that you need to keep up a facade of cheerfulness.
• Reach out and do something for someone less fortunate.
• Go to your church or synagogue.
• Create some new holiday rituals that are self nurturing and meaningful to you, letting go of some that no  longer serve.
• Re-evaluate what is really important to you
• Stay away from the shadow side of the Holidays, that of frantic activity and overspending.

More important that anything else is to find a space in your schedule to be still and allow the profoundly sacred to enter your heart and warm you, connecting you with the holiness of the season.